Saturday, October 31, 2009

Should Dreamscapes Retire?

I'm thinking about hanging this blog up and going for one that's more targeted. While I won't erase it, it's got some great memories recorded, I may grab some old posts and move them into a new, improved blog.

It's time to come up with a new title, a real focus, and a way to get some attention through social networking. Posting every six weeks or thereabouts is not going to get this blog noticed.

Some of my areas of expertise and/or interest are:

Frugal living (isn't everyone these days?)
Changing careers & job hunting
Grant writing
Causes: LGBT rights, especially youth
Health Care reform
I'm interested also in books and read a great deal, also in animal protection, human rights and other topics. What to choose??
That's going to be my question to ponder for the time being.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

How to Conduct An Interview

Recruiters, take heed. There are millions of job seekers out there, and we’re comparing notes.

Sure, the economy is supposedly recovering, but meanwhile job losses continue and the official unemployment rate is climbing towards 10 percent. That means work for you is down too, and many recruiters have received pink slips. At one recruiting agency for nonprofit organizations, every time I call, I hear another staff person has left.

So for those of you who remain standing through all this chaos, it’s imperative that you do your job well. This includes treating potential recruits with respect.

We may be a dime a dozen, but we’ve got more than one avenue for job hunting. We’ve studied up on the job market and we know which fields are in demand. Some of us have taken courses on writing better resumes and cover letters. Because this is the worst period of unemployment and general economic shakiness since the Great Depression, we’ve prepared ourselves for the job market as never before.

So please, don’t give us unsolicited advice about fixing up our resumes. If we’re having trouble getting interviews, we’ll ask for help. Don’t take it on yourselves to reformat or rewrite our resumes. One recruiter insisted my resume had to fit onto one page, and left out important information about my most recent positions in order to make it fit. Others drop the font until you’d need a microscope to read it. It’s a resume, not a Procrustean bed, folks!

An interview should help the recruiter elicit a candidate’s experience and positive traits. Ask the right questions to get these answers. Nit-picking at the resume and asking why we left our last three positions may be relevant, but if you fail to balance these questions with questions such as, “Describe your greatest achievement,” “What do you like most about (occupation),” or “How would you deal with this situation…” you’re not letting us put our best feet forward. That’s a loss to you, and a loss to the organization on whose behalf you are interviewing candidates. By being too zealous about making the candidate justify her years as a stay-at-home Mom, or questioning every achievement as if you are conducting a cross-examination with a hostile witness, you’re letting the good ones slip away under your radar.

Please don’t tell an older candidate to drop his college graduation date off the resume. We’ve read the pros and cons, and the decision to leave it in and face possible ageism is not an oversight. You aren’t the expert on his job search: he is. His next prospective employer could interpret the lack of a graduation date as evasiveness about his age or even put his claim to a degree in doubt.

In short, the more respectful and friendly you are, the more you establish rapport with a candidate rather than creating a back-room interrogation atmosphere, the better you’ll be able to elicit the candidate’s best examples of her skills and experience. Try this approach and you’ll find more potential employees for your clients. The bottom line? That’s more money in your pocket.

And remember, what goes around comes around. Treat us with respect, and we’ll keep in touch. When that pink slip comes your way, one of your former recruits might just point you towards your next position.

Sunday, August 30, 2009

A Song for Healthcare Reform

This is roughly to the tune of Meat Loaf's "Took the Words Right Out of My Mouth." Unfortunately my singing voice frightens the horses. I'm hoping someone who can play an instrument and sing might adopt this and use it at rallies.

The doctor said you needed a new operation
Well the doctor said you needed a pill
The insurance man said, No, you can't have that
Stay healthy or just go to hell!

The doctor said, without this treatment you're dead
There was nothing else they could do
So we sold off our house and we sold off our stuff
Almost sold off our firstborn too
Then we lost our jobs, no more insurance
Everything we worked for was gone
The emergency doctor said, we'll take care of you
But you didn't get here fast enough
You died in the ER, you died in the ER,
The insurance man laughed and said, Tough!

We gotta break their power, we gotta take back our lives
We gotta make the US join the first world
We gotta have single payer
Before we're all dead
Pass the public plan today, single payer tomorrow
Fight on for the people, fight on for the people, win it, win it now for Ted!

I've posted this on Facebook and sent it to Moveon.org. I hope it will be useful, because protest songs can really get people going. That's my contribution to the movement!

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Health Care Rally in Times Square





Bruce and I attended the rally for Healthcare Reform in Times Square this afternoon. I think there were more than the 1,000 people the media is reporting, but anyhow, we were a lively and spirited crowd. Bruce and I were right near the barricades, so we held our signs up facing the passing cars. Taxi drivers were especially happy to see us and honked their horns, even jumping out of their cabs at the red lights to take some of our flyers. Most of the tourists on the double decker buses seemed to support us also.

I'm convinced that more people support the public option and even single payer health care than the media is reporting. It's just that we may not be as vocal as we need to be. It's hard to get people to turn out to demonstrations, especially on a day where it rained in the morning. But I wore my poncho and went, rain or shine.

There was lots of positive energy at this rally and I hope we can continue to build on this energy and create a groundswell.

"Be Careful With My Heart," POP Arts at Hetrick-Martin

After our visit to the Zoo, we headed into Greenwich Village to see a POP Arts show at The Hetrick-Martin Institute. POP Arts stands for Peers Outreaching to Peers, and the program educates young people about safe sex, STI and HIV prevention, and facts about STI's and HIV/AIDS. They also learn acting techniques and scriptwriting, and together they write their own play to inform other youths about what they have learned.

This year's show was a stunner. Called, "Be Careful With My Heart," it portrayed just about every kind of relationship: straight, gay, lesbian, and bisexual. Kids of various orientations attended a party where couples went off to bedrooms together, and heavy consequences resulted. There were breakups, there was risky sex, heartbreak and betrayal. Yet there was also a lot of built-in comedy so that the show was anything but grim.

One young woman sang a beautiful song, and there was a hot and humorous dance number. This is a talented bunch of young people coming to terms with different sexuality and with the hormonal ups and downs of horny teenagers. After the show, the performers answered questions from the audience. Many people were so touched that happy tears were shed. It was truly a moving and educational performance.

I was particularly struck by the dilemma one young woman faces. She is Muslim, and their tolerance of gays and lesbians is slim to none. I had to admire her courage in coming to Hetrick-Martin and taking part in this show, and I hope it will not blow up in her face if her father ever finds out what the show was all about.

Hetrick-Martin accomplishes so much with kids who would otherwise fall by the wayside. I'm proud to be associated with this great organization.

Thursday at the Zoo







We visited the Bronx Zoo to celebrate Jason's 20th birthday. Thanks to his summer job, he was able to get all of us in for free and get us a 30% discount on lunch as well.

The animals were great. I enjoyed seeing many baby animals: a little lemur named "Cupid" because he was born on Valentine's Day, a baby giraffe, and a baby flamingo. Peacocks roam the Zoo grounds at will, and we got up close and personal with a peahen and her adorable chick. It's always fun to visit the zoo and learn some new facts about the animals there.

Saturday, August 08, 2009

Don't Believe the Scare Stories

It amazes me that people are believing the Republicans and the big insurance companies who are bending over backwards to stop a public health care option. They're shaking in their shoes believing that the government is going to decide who lives and who dies.

Guess what, people, wake up! Right now that's exactly what the insurance companies are doing. Not to mention the people who don't have insurance coverage, either because they are out of work (realistically, close to 20% of us when you count the underemployed and those who have given up) or because their employers simply don't choose to provide it. They're skipping doctor visits and taking half doses of needed medication. And guess what else, our infant mortality rates are the highest and our life expectancy rates are the lowest, in the industrialized world.

Even if you have insurance coverage, a layoff will do away with it. And even if you have insurance coverage, your necessary treatment could well be denied, even though it could save your life. So who is deciding whether you live or die? Not your doctor, that's for sure.

Back in the sixties, a cousin of mine was having a terrible struggle to have a healthy child. She had one miscarriage after another. Nobody's fault, right?

Wrong. She and her husband moved to the Netherlands so he could take a job there and complete a Ph.D. The Netherlands happen to have -- gasp -- socialized medicine. My cousin was placed on complete hospital bedrest for months of her pregnancies, and gave birth to three healthy children who are now young adults. Not one of them would have been born in the US where months of hospitalization would have been prohibitively expensive. I don't even think anyone suggested it to her as an option, here in the good old USA, best damn country in the world...except when it comes to taking care of our people.

Sure, there will have to be cuts, so how about if we cut down on unnecessary tests and on unnecessary procedures? Why does the U.S. have a disproportionately high number of caesarian section births? How about cutting back on that and having more natural childbirths? We can certainly trim expenses without harming anybody.

It's time to stop listening to the lies of greedy people who would rather snap up your money and let you die in a ditch, than see you cared for at the government's expense. It's time to insist that we catch up to the civilized world and take care of all our people...rich, poor or middle class, from the cradle to the grave, no exceptions.

Saturday, August 01, 2009

Leaving a Bad Situation

Consulting has a glamorous ring to it, but there's a down side as well. It's not steady work, and you sometimes have to be very aggressive in collecting your fees. Then there are the situations that should never arise.

I made the mistake of accepting a consulting position with an organization that had very little money. I knew they had almost nothing in advance, because I looked up their 990. But they promised me 15 to 20 hours of work a week, and I gave them a discount because they are a small organization.

That won't happen again. From now on, I will insist on being paid what I am worth; otherwise they can take their business elsewhere.

I also agreed to give them 15 hours of pro bono time to "get acclimated." If I had known that they were not going to stick with their original agreement, this also would never have happened. I certainly will not ever do it again.

All along, I was having constant conflict with the Executive Director, Z. Every time I asked a question she would throw some papers at me and tell me I had all that I needed, she needed to get her work done and I had to be a "big girl" and become independent. This is not the way to get a new consultant off to a good start. She also wanted to throw a number of proposals out the door, on the advice of a consultant with many years of experience.

When I investigated the targeted foundations, I found that almost all of them were a waste of time (and money). Most did not actually give to their cause. Some did but gave only out of state. Others had suspended grants because they were suffering as a result of the economic downturn. In fact, only one or two were viable choices, out of twelve. However, I continued to receive pressure to "tweak" the template proposal, a general operating support proposal that was requesting a huge amount of money to completely staff this tiny little volunteer organization, and shove it out the door.

Knowing this would not bring them any money, I was reluctant to follow through. I also received continual comments on just about everything, even whether I walked fast enough for Z., who claimed she had become a "real New Yorker" because she zips down the street at top speed.

Finally, I saw that the first week I was "on the clock," I actually was given only 8 hours of work, and when I asked where my 15-20 hours were, Z. told me that she could not afford to pay me for more than 5 hours a week because they "have no money."

Didn't they know that when they hired me?

I told her she really can't afford me, and should hire a student intern to do the work. A student would not be able to do the same quality of work, but since the organization seemed focused on quantity rather than quality, that shouldn't matter. Z. countered by asking if I were willing to take a reduction in my hourly rate so that she could give me more hours.

Wrong!

On Thursday I gave her my invoice for the 8 hours of work and quit. We had some harsh words; she is volatile and makes personal attacks. However, when she calmed down I suggested that she close down the organization and turn it into a program within some other, better funded nonprofit.

In any case, next time, I will not accept an assignment from an organization that has a tiny budget, especially one that has been incorporated for 8 years and is still not solvent. I'll know, next time, that there's a reason they have not been successful, and that I'm not going to be the one to pull them out of the morass they have made for themselves.

Monday, July 20, 2009

Salute to Pregnancy

The New York Metro published a photo of pregnant women walking the bases at Keyspan Park, home of the Brooklyn Cyclones. This was a "Salute to Pregnancy." Apparently any woman who names her baby "Brooklyn" or "Cy" will receive season tickets for free.

Gee, that seems like a wonderful reason to saddle a helpless baby with a name that will embarrass him for the rest of his life. Cy isn't too bad, but Brooklyn? I thought the 60's were over and we weren't giving our kids stupid names like "Moon Unit," "God," or "Freedom" anymore.

And maybe I'm being a curmudgeon, but why are we celebrating pregnancy at a time when money is so tight? Is this really a great time to be bringing more kids into the world, when families are already struggling to feed the mouths that are already here? I don't get it. Anyone who is pregnant right now got pregnant, at the earliest, last November when the economy was already tanking. It surely wouldn't have been my choice; I'd wait until there was a better economic picture. But, I guess I have always been too sensible.

Maybe it's just a function of more people being out of work and attending the "poor man's opera" because they are home all day anyhow. After all, 9 months after the Buffalo Blizzard of 1977, there was a bumper crop of babies and one hospital in Buffalo gave the newborns tiny tee shirts that said, "Blizzard Baby."

Or maybe I shouldn't be so critical. Maybe having a baby is a way of expressing hope, that the recession will pass and prosperity will return. I sure hope it does so all these babies (and I've seen more pregnant women this year than I have in a long time) will have the food, clothing and shelter they need to grow and thrive.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Big Bucks

Today, AM NY reported that a man who bought a pack of cigarettes received a whomping $23.1 quadrillion charge on his credit card bill.

Sure, it's ridiculous, and he doesn't have to pay, along with the others who suffered a similar glitch. But maybe it was a sign to him, that smoking cigarettes is much, much more expensive than the price of the pack. It might well cost him something worth more than quadrillions of dollars: his life.

The Bay News had a charming photo of Duke, one of the Aquarium's sea lions, giving a "sea lion kiss" to a young lady. The caption read that sea lion kisses are being sold as fundraisers for the New York Aquarium, at $200 a pop. $200? Wait a second! I happen to know that the real cost is $20. What a big blooper for the Bay News, whose proofreaders didn't catch that extra zero.

Then again, if some rich folks decide to buy $200 kisses, maybe the Bay News has done the Aquarium a big favor. It happened to me in my early days as a fundraiser: I tacked on an extra zero to a renewal request of a man who'd sent an unsolicited gift of $100 the year before. My boss chewed me out and told me to be more attentive to details, but the letter asking him to renew his gift of "$1000" had already been mailed. He sent the $1,000, and the next year he sent $10,000. So, we can only hope that this typo will turn into a windfall for the Aquarium.

Duke should only know that his kisses are 24-carat.

Friday, July 10, 2009

David's Dad

Last Thursday, the day Bruce was laid off after 23 years at National Envelope Corporation, we had a phone call we missed until early Friday morning. My childhood friend, David, called to say his father passed away.

Max was a quiet man. I remember him well but I never felt I knew him all that well. David's mother was the one involved with the children the most, so I remember her personality much more clearly.

What I do remember about Max is that he was a sheet metal worker who changed careers, becoming an elementary school teacher instead. At that time, the mid-sixties, this was just about unheard of. I knew people who had one job their whole working lives. Certainly, my Dad had the one job at Regal Emblem Company, polishing and electroplating costume jewelry and emblems. He was offered the chance to get a government job and turned it down, afraid of change.

But Max wasn't afraid. He had a dream and he followed his dream. Sometimes the kids gave him aggravation, but he must have been very happy that he made that change. In any case, his bold move stayed with me. When I changed careers, jumping out of legal publishing into fundraising, it was his example I followed. If he could do it at a time when it just wasn't done, how much easier would it be for me?

Max and Muriel raised three good human beings, and that's the highest achievement a parent can reach. So long, Max, I'll remember you.

Sunday, July 05, 2009

Hot Dog!

Yesterday Bruce and I went to Coney Island to check out the Nathan's Hot Dog eating contest. I never realized that this famous July 4th tradition originated in 1916, the year my mother was born. We could hardly see the stage, but we could watch the proceedings on the ESPN screen.

Unfortunately the contest was supposed to start at noon but did not begin until about 12:50 PM and we just had other things to do. So we left before the contest started and got home while it was in progress. I got a laugh out of some of the contest rules, especially the one that said a contestant would be disqualified for "Reversal of Fortune." The contestants were called "Gurgitators," another one of those nonexistent words, sort of like "sheveled." Chucking up recycled hot dogs is a no no! One of the ESPN newscasters put hot dogs, mustard and ketchup into a blender and then took a swig of liquified frankfurter! Hilarious and yucky.

The crowd was taking sides; some rooting for Chestnut (who became a 3 time champ by scarfing down 68 hot dogs this year) while others rooted for Kobiyashi and held up signs saying "Kobiyashi eats chestnuts for breakfast!"

Directly in front of us, a group of young people were wearing bright yellow tee shirts advertising "Thatsnotcool.com," a website educating kids about the dangers of cyberbullying and how to fight back against online harassment, stalking, etc. I enjoyed speaking with them.

While I was annoyed that we didn't get to see the actual contest, at least we did get to see the build up to it. There was quite a crowd and some of them probably had been there for hours. It was amusing and finally I can say we attended a world class sports event!

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Mermaid Parade, 2009







Coney Island's "denizens of the deep" came out to play again this year at the start of summer. This year's Mermaid Parade began in the rain, but that didn't matter: mermaids don't melt!
They did, however, carry umbrellas and walk a lot faster than in previous years.
Before the parade began, I headed into a bar to use the facilities. There was a long line and I got talking with a gentleman wearing his hair in two pigtails, complete with teal streaks. He also wore a skirt fashioned from a transparent plastic tablecloth adorned with flowers. This was a clever way of keeping his legs dry in the rain, which was coming down pretty hard at that time. In the bar, I spotted Jennifer Miller, the bearded woman who runs Circus Amok (another one of my favorite entertainments).
We met Ferdinand on the bus heading over to the parade, but he was so intent on finding a good spot to stand that he got too far ahead of us. So we didn't stand together this year. However we met him again at the end of the parade.
I recognized a lot of the same faces from last year's parade. We saw the Elvis impersonator, the Parrot Man, the painted ladies, and of course Marty Markowitz, the Borough President, telling us we are all "meshugah" (crazy) and that this was the most undressed parade in town. (I've seen a lot of seminudity at the Pride parades too, though). The Polar Bear Club was there, along with the Rude Mechanical Orchestra, the Brooklyn Bombshells, and so on. There was the usual contingent of pirates, men in kilts, and mermaids with seashell or sea star pasties on their breasts. The costumes were up to their usual standard of wild, wacky, imaginative and sexy.
This year, Barnum and Bailey was there, but I wasn't so thrilled about that. The ASPCA has a lawsuit against them for violating the Endangered Species Act, and the circus's job application asked whether the applicant "is or has ever been" a member of PETA, The Humane Society, the ASPCA and other animal protection organizations. It smacked of the McCarthy Era and when I brought Jason's attention to it, he decided not to apply. Therefore I wasn't so happy to see the circus in the parade, even though the clown noses so many people wore were pretty cute. (Clown mermaids?)
The rain stopped after a while so that made it easier to take photos, but we had competition from the photographers who seemed to stop right in front of me every time a parader stopped and posed. There were so many photos I could have taken if they hadn't blocked my view. Still, I managed to take 930 photos and ruthlessly (!) chopped them down to a mere 291. Onward to the parade in 2010!









Friday, May 29, 2009

Star Trek: The New Movie

This time, it really is the next generation. All of the old actors from the original show have been phased out, except that Leonard Nimoy as the elderly Spock still had a part.

I thoroughly enjoyed this romp through space and time. It was pretty easy to tell who the bad guys were: they had pointy ears, deathly pale faces, and wore ugly, sharp-edged facial tattoos. Clear signs of villainy.

It was amazing witnessing the "birth" of James T. Kirk and then seeing him briefly as an adventurous and rowdy twelve year old rocketing around in an antique car (retooled from the 20th century!). I don't know cars so I would not attempt to describe the model but it clearly dated back to the early 1960's or even before. Most of the new actors fit perfectly into their roles as "baby" Kirk, Spock, Bones, etc. Uhura seemed a little older than the rest whereas on the original show she was either the same age as the captain or younger. Chekhov bore no resemblance to the original actor, but that didn't particularly bother me.

It was a fun movie, despite the destruction of Vulcan and the loss of Amanda, Spock's mother. I wonder if they will be able to go back in time and prevent these tragedies in a future episode. If so, or whatever they decide to do next, I'm up for it.

The last moments of the movie, light playing over the "brand new" original Enterprise, with the words, "Space...the final frontier..." as a voiceover, put a chill right down my baby boomer spine. And Generation Y'er Jason loved it as well. So did Bruce. All three of us recommend it highly.

Crisis: Danger and Opportunity

I've always heard that the Chinese character for "crisis" contains the characters for "danger" and "opportunity." Well, our family is in a crisis. On the Monday before Memorial Day, Bruce arrived at work to learn that the division he has worked at for 23 years is shutting down operations, and almost everyone except for a few family members and high ranking managers is being laid off.

So, we are all looking for work. I am hoping to become more visible as a freelance writer, even as I am seeking part time and full time employment. Bruce is looking for work in inventory control and purchasing, and Jason has many options either in animal care, clerical, or bookkeeping work.

Still, it's a scary proposition because so many well-qualified people have already lost their jobs. I hear unemployment has been extended out to 72 weeks now, but unemployment would not pay all our bills. So, we'd have to deplete savings until someone is back at work and able to support the family.

There's been a psychological toll, of course. We've all had interrupted sleep, and I managed to come down with some sort of bad cold or garden variety flu (not swine, thank goodness). The only up side to this is that I have not left my house since Monday, and therefore haven't spent any money.

This is going to be the real test of whether we can be frugal enough to get through a period of unemployment without sacrificing some fun and games.

Friday, May 15, 2009

What a week!

This has been an exciting week for me. The grant proposal I was writing for The Hetrick-Martin Institute has finally gone out and the initial feedback is good.

I've finally overcome a mild case of writer 's block, and wrote a piece yesterday on the Buffalo Blizzard of 1977, which I experienced as a 22 year-old law student. Do the math, and I've just given away my age! I'm saving that for December as a friend in Franklinville assures me that the Blizzard of '77 is still memorialized each January in the Buffalo newspapers. Maybe they'll be interested in my personal experiences as an out-of-towner who had never experienced anything quite so devastating as a blizzard that shut down a city for two weeks.

Yesterday I submitted two stories to various magazines, and I submitted a third on Monday.

Also yesterday, while I indulged in lunch at Burger King, I received a call from Youth at Risk, inviting me to work for them on a short term prospect research project next week. This is not the first time I've been offered contract work as a result of sending out a resume for a part time job, and it proves that organizations do in fact keep promising resumes on file.

So I am revved and optimistic about what's to come. The weekend should be fun; we are planning to visit the Brooklyn Waterfront Artists Coalition's "Color of Hope" art show in Red Hook on Saturday afternoon, and I have the Brooklyn Humanist Community Book Club on Sunday. I wish all my readers a wonderful weekend and week to come.

Saturday, May 09, 2009

"The Mermaid Chair"

After reading The Secret Life of Bees I got Sue Monk Kidd's The Mermaid Chair and read that also. I enjoyed this book just as much.

It had elements of The Bridges of Madison County. Jessie's been married for twenty years and has a grown daughter in college. She's facing a mid-life crisis with her marriage gone stale, and is seeking something she's not sure of. At the same time, her mother, who has been steeped in excessive religiosity since Jessie's father died, has erupted into madness, cutting off her own finger.

Jessie goes to her mother without her husband Hugh, a psychiatrist and a bit of a know it all. The island she grew up on, Egret Island off the coast of South Carolina, has a peculiar custom. There's a monastery there to a St. Senara. Legend has it that this saint was a mermaid who converted to Catholicism, and became a saint. There's a carved "mermaid chair" kept at the church that is carried to the docks and used to bless the fleet on St. Senara's Day.

While she's trying to help her mother and to unravel the puzzle of her mother's self-destructive act, Jessie falls in love with one of the Benedictine monks, Brother Thomas, who has not yet taken his final vows. Jessie and Brother Thomas (Whit) find they have tragedy in common. Jessie's father died at sea when she was nine years old, supposedly blown to bits by a spark from the pipe she gave him. Jessie has lived with a terrible sense of guilt for all these years. Brother Thomas, a former attorney, has joined the monastery to escape from the pain of losing his wife and unborn daughter in a car crash.

The story is permeated by mermaid and siren symbolism and imagery, just as bees permeate the story of The Secret Life of Bees. Jessie, away from her husband and having instigated a separation, begins to find herself, to expand and be the artist she has always longed to be. She realizes that she has pushed herself into too small a space, always putting Hugh and their daughter first and her own amibitions and desires second. She's very similar to Francesca in Bridges in this respect.

The lovers are both "saved and damned" by their connection. Their brief affair forces them both to look at what they really want in life and what they have been hiding from. The mystery of Jessie's father's death is revealed, too, and brings a healing both to her and her mother.

I'm quickly becoming an avid Sue Monk Kidd fan, and I look forward to her future novels.

Bronx Zoo Photos






On April 26th we braved the 92 degree record-breaking temperature and visited the Bronx Zoo. While it was "too darn hot" to see all the attractions, we did manage to see a number of fascinating animals. Here are a few of them.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

The Secret Life of Bees

In May our Book Club will discuss Sue Monk Kidd's "The Secret Life of Bees." This was a book that surprised me. Some of the works we have read have been way too depressing. This book is a book of hope.

It begins in the summer of 1964, at a critical juncture in the Civil Rights movement. Lily, fourteen years old, has bees living in the walls of her room. Her father, T. Ray, is neglectful and contemptuous of her. Lily's mother is dead, and her death is a source of Lily's shame and guilt, because she remembers just enough to believe she is the one who accidentally shot her mother to death at the age of four.

Their maid, Rosaleen, decides she is going to go and register to vote. That's controversialin the south where they live, and Lily foresees danger. She accompanies Rosaleen and it goes badly. Rosaleen is accosted by three very bigoted men and she retaliates by pouring snuff juice on their shoes. For this insult both she and Lily are hauled off to jail, and T. Ray bails Lily out but punishes her by making her kneel on raw grits. He calls them the "white Marthas" and I don't know what the origin of that expression might be, unless it's a contrast with the black Mary we meet later on in the story.

Lily has two mementos of her mother, a photograph and a portrait of a black Madonna. On the back is written, "Tiburon, SC." Coincidentally (not), her mother's name was Deborah, which means "bee."

Lily helps Rosaleen escape from the hospital where she is recovering from a savage beating by the three men who accosted her. They head to Tiburon just because Lily believes her mother must have once been there. In a grocery store, Lily sees a jar of honey with the same black Madonna on the label, and realizes the connection. She's led by this synchronicity to the home of the Calendar sisters, May, June and August.

August is the beekeeper who manufactures the Black Madonna honey. When Lily and Rosaleen arrive August welcomes them and allows them to stay with the family. She teaches Lily how to help with harvesting the honey and making the beeswax candles August sells to retailers across the country.

June, however, is not so welcoming. Her attitude to Lily is harsh at first. She makes Lily feel like an outsider in a black home when Lily is the one white person. Later, though, her attitude softens.

May, on the other hand, is so sensitive as to be dysfunctional. Anything that upsets her starts her singing,"Oh, Susanna," and running out to her "wall," a homemade "Wailing Wall" where she writes her sorrows and prayers, and puts them between the stones she has piled up there. There was a twin to May, named April, but April could not stand the restrictions and humiliations of racism, and she committed suicide as a teenager.

In this home, Lily begins to flourish as a young woman should. She learns beekeeping and she takes part in religious ceremonies where the sisters and their friends worship the black Mary, a ship's masthead that has become their holy icon. It's a blend of Catholicism and their own, woman-identified worship, that gives them all a feeling of strength and solidarity. One or two men take part in these ceremonies as well.

Lily meets Zach, the student who has been helping August since he started high school, and a tenuous, forbidden love starts to grow between them. In that era, in the deep south, there is no "place or time" for a black boy and a white girl. Yet they do have a few stolen moments, apparently condoned by the other women. Zach is determined to become a lawyer and fight for civil rights, a determination that is only strengthened when he is jailed unfairly for supposedly throwing a bottle or rock at the police.

The bees, their honey, and their secret lives, as they work for and tend the queen,become a metaphor for the family that Lily has discovered. She has found her hive, with the sweetness of love. The black Mary has become her loving mother, the one she has yearned for, the one whose love she has missed out on all her life.

The symbolism of honey, bees, and the black Mary permeate the book. Synchronicities abound, and Lily discovers that her mother did indeed stay at the sisters' home when she ran away from T. Ray. Even Lily's name has a symbolic meaning.

T. Ray tracks her down and tries to force her to come back to the peach farm with him. Legally he has that right, but it turns out that August and the other women are able to convince him to let Lily stay. She's lived through May's suicide, June's marriage, and she's learned the full story about her mother. She's found her hive and her queen bee, and she's ready to become a woman.

I enjoyed this book immensely with its spiritual overtones, with the majesty of the downtrodden, "like royalty among us," as Lily says. Even with Zach, there is a bit of hope because they walk together in the halls of the white high school where he has boldly enrolled, and ignore the taunts and crumpled paper students throw at them.

Honey is a healing agent: that's recently been "discovered" though people closer to the earth have probably known it for centuries. Synchronicity and following her heart leads Lily to Tiburon where she finds her heart's desire.

Read this book!It's not brand new, and I missed it when it was, but if you missed it the first time around now is the time to read and savor it. This seems to be a book designed to be read during the summer heat, set as it is in the sweltering Carolina summertime.

Yopp!

In Dr. Seuss's classic, "Horton Hears a Who," every one of the tiny people on a speck of dust had to shout as loudly as they could in order to be heard by the other animals, who were intent on boiling the flower and locking Horton away in a cage. The infinitesimal Mayor of Whoville raced through the town to make sure everyone was doing his or her part.

It seems that way at first. People are shouting and singing, brass bands playing, drums thumping. But it's not enough. Finally in the very last building the Mayor discovers the smallest of all the Who's, a little child standing alone, doing nothing but playing with a yo-yo.

The Mayor grabs him and delivers a passionate speech. "This is your town's darkest hour!" he tells the little one. Convinced that destruction is near, the child at last opens his mouth and shouts out an amazingly loud, "YOPP!"

That one "yopp" puts it over and the other animals are able to hear that there are in fact sentient beings down there on that tiny dust speck. They are saved and Horton is a hero, instead of being caged as a lunatic.

That was one of my favorite stories as a little girl. Maybe that's why I keep answering the petitions that come to me in emails, why I keep sending my tiny donations and speaking out when I sense injustice.

I'm only one person shouting "Yopp!" but a whole lot of us little Who's got our voices heard last November, and now we at least have an administration that has its ear to the ground, listening for our "Yopps!"

And so I will continue to shout.

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Dreams From My Father

I've just finished Barack Obama's Dreams From My Father, a memoir of his childhood, youth and young adulthood. His struggles to come to terms with an absent father, his interracial and international background, and his entry into community organizing, are all here. Obama is an eloquent writer and it's a pleasure to read his descriptions of people, landscapes, and inner thoughts.

What this brings across to me is that President Obama has a handle on life in other nations and other cultures, that most Americans simply can't imagine. He's lived abroad and visited the country of his roots. How many of us have done that? I know when I toured other countries I felt removed from the people there, on the outside looking in at their daily lives. Tourists see museums and national monuments, not the living rooms of the inhabitants. Obama's experiences go so much deeper than that.

He has thought long and hard about his background and his image of his father, mostly compiled of stories told by his other relatives. He's thought long and hard about his racial status and about how to elevate the African American's status in our society.

It's refreshing and encouraging to have a President who can think, examine his own emotions, and write. I'd certainly recommend Dreams From My Father to anyone who would like a greater understanding of our new President.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Rat in a handbag

That sounds scary, but it isn't. I took a walk on Avenue U today, doing various errands. At about East 22nd Street I spotted a woman who looked awfully familiar. I wasn't quite sure though, because she was wearing sunglasses and her hair was shorter than I remembered. She was looking at me also.

She took off her glasses and sure enough, we recognized each other. The woman was Rosemarie, the person in charge of the Animal Laboratory at Lincoln HS. We stood and talked for a number of minutes, catching up on our families and other news. Rosemarie said she was just coming from the veterinarian, that she'd had to take one of the animals from the lab to the doctor.

She pointed to her handbag and said the rat was inside. I asked to see, and she lifted out little Snoopy, an adorable black and white female rat. It seems Snoopy had mites, and had to see the vet. Rosemarie was on her way back to Lincoln where she was going to scrub out Snoopy's cage and herself too, to make sure there were no more mites.

She's so comfortable and loving with those animals. I loved the way she had Snoopy walking up her arm as we were talking. What a surprise and what a treat! I hope we'll get together soon (maybe with Snoopy, too).

Friday, March 27, 2009

"Waiting"

Last night Bruce, Jason and I attended a fundraiser for The Hetrick-Martin Institute, at the Middle Collegiate Church in the East Village. The young people in their after-school POP Arts program put on a musical play called "Waiting," and used it as a fundraiser. They got an excellent turnout and brought in about $2,000 for the agency.

The play was about waiting for HIV results, waiting for pregnancy results, for love, etc. The kids wrote the scenes and the music. We were sitting a little too far back so some of the lines got by me, and I couldn't always see. But it is clear this is a talented group of kids!

It was great to see the staff and exchange greetings. A few people came over and I introduced Bruce and Jason to them. After spending the day helping with grants there, it's great to see the kids who benefit from the work!

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Another "Dollar Stretcher" Publication

My latest publication in the online and print magazine, "The Dollar Stretcher," has appeared online. Here's a link to the article, "Out of Work? Volunteer!" The article describes the benefits of volunteering while unemployed, and gives suggestions for people looking for a simpatico organization to volunteer for.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Take the Money Back!

We have money invested with AIG and if they go under, we'll lose it. But I'm willing to lose that money in order to rescue taxpayer money from these greedy pigs.

They create a financial mess and the company is in danger of going under. Instead of getting canned and standing on the unemployment lines with all the innocent people their greed and incompetence put out of work, they're getting bonuses. No, better yet, we're paying for these bonuses. And they're saying they can't break these contracts or AIG will get sued.

Well, hey, so let them get sued! The government needs to scoop back the money that was given to them as a bailout, in an attempt to stop the economy from going under. Instead they used it to line their own pockets. Let's take back the money. AIG will be judgment proof, so who cares if some disgruntled executives...some of whom were responsible for this mess in the first place...get ticked off and sue?

You can't get blood from a stone.

These despicable characters should lose their jobs and they should be held accountable. Maybe we should bring back tarring and feathering, and ride them out of the country on a rail.

Getting those bonuses is the last thing that should happen, whatever it takes to force them to give back the money.

Wednesday, March 04, 2009

Nothing to be Frightened Of

Nothing to be Frightened Of by Julian Barnes is a major departure from most of the memoirs I have read recently. It's got to do with his own family life but not in the usual way. He speaks of his parents' personalities and their attitudes towards death, as part of his own musings on the fear of death, and the influence of his own atheism (and more recently in his life, agnosticism) on his fear or lack thereof.

He brings in the stories and thoughts of many other famous writers: Flaubert, Renard, etc. What distinguishes this memoir is that it is not the usual litany of sorrows, the typical dysfunctional family or terrible disease that generally crops up in these books. It's about ideas first and the circumstances of his life second.

I've gotten so tired of the typical "my life was dreadful but I have triumphed" story line. That doesn't mean I am boycotting memoirs but I'd like to see more variety in them. Nothing to be Frightened Of isn't a light book, in fact it is so dense that I am reading it much more slowly than usual. Yet Barnes has a sense of humor about it all and manages to say something funny on almost every page. He's also talking about a subject that haunts us all but almost no one ever speaks about. I appreciate that.

Saturday, February 28, 2009

Good News

This past week, the New York Times carried two stories I was happy to read. In "Study Documents the Stress of Waiting for Biopsy Results," a Harvard study reported that women who had to wait more than five days for results of a breast biopsy had stress hormone levels in their blood just as high as if they'd been told they had cancer. Why is this good news? It's good news because, finally, someone is paying attention to the dangers of waiting ridiculously long periods for test results.

The high stress levels could actually impact on a woman's ability to fight off the disease. So being forced to wait is more than just mental torture, it's actually harmful and can affect the outcome. Maybe now that this study has been published, medical labs will be pressured to produce results considerably faster.

Each time I had another test, I had to wait, usually at least a week. Those weeks are spent in a hellish way station. Without the answer, it is impossible to visualize the future. Will life go on as before? Or will it be permanently, perhaps fatally altered? There are times when we can take our minds off the test, but it comes back, again and again. Then comes the moment of the fateful phone call, with the receiver slippery in the sweating palm.

Speeding up the process and getting an answer is much better than prolonged waiting. I hope that this study will provide the incentive that's needed to respect our psyches and our health by getting the results out quickly.

The other good news was in an article about schoolroom furniture. Schoolroom furniture? That's right. The story, "Students Stand When Called Upon, and When Not" describes an experiment in Minnesota classrooms. Children who are wiggly and find it difficult to sit still throughout the school day now have the option of standing up during class. Special desks and stools that adjust to allow for sitting or standing have been placed in classrooms. There are also footrests so the students can stand and swing their feet while they do their lessons.

If only this furniture had been developed 13 years earlier and implemented in New York City classrooms, Jason's first grade might have been a bit easier. His first grade teacher might as well have flown to class on a broomstick. Rumor had it that she'd taught in Catholic school and was used to imposing harsh discipline on little children. Once, a little girl came to school without her bottle of Elmer's glue, because her mother had forgotten to buy it. Jason's teacher made this child stand up for the entire day as punishment.

No one was allowed to sharpen a pencil in her class. So what did you do if it broke? One day another little girl was discovered with pencil shavings on the floor under her desk. Horrors! She was accused, and when she pleaded not guilty, the teacher branded her a liar in front of the class.

She tore up Jason's coloring because he colored outside the lines (and she knew he was receiving physical therapy). After that, Jason lost interest in any arts and crafts. Our friend Richard, on hearing this, said she ought to be horsewhipped. I would have watched that with pleasure.

One of her complaints about Jason, when we met with her for open school night, was that he stood up while working. Such a terrible sin had to be squelched. I can only imagine how she must have badgered him.

I should have gone to the principal but I was afraid if I did she would take it out on Jason. I suppose I should have waited until he was done with first grade and then complained. But I was afraid, also, that she might be assigned to teach a higher grade, and he could end up in her class again. So I never said anything, except directly to her.

Anyway, now, too late for Jason but not too late for the next generation, there's finally some recognition that kids don't have to be sitting down with their little hands neatly folded in order to learn. Some of them learn by moving. Jason wasn't even aware that he was getting out of his seat. Tomorrow's children can just adjust the desk, and sit or stand at their pleasure.

I bet they will learn just fine, and I bet they will be happier and more eager to go to school than the past generations of kids who were forced into a cookie cutter.

That's the good news that was fit to print.

Friday, February 20, 2009

A Demagogue's Task

Today as I walked uptown to the Mid-Manhattan Library I passed the CUNY Graduate Center. A sign in the doorway read, in huge white-on-red lettering, "A demagogue's task is to become as stupid as her audience, so that they will believe they are as clever as she is."

I don't know the origin of this quote but it was reproduced in such size that it struck me as well worth repeating here.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Shame on the NY Post

The New York Post has a long history of tasteless and offensive reporting. I remember the headline, "Headless Body Found in Topless Bar." Ugh! This time, though, they have gone over the line.

A few days ago, a chimpanzee that was kept as a house pet and "acted human" went berserk and mauled a woman who was a guest at the home. The chimp's owner tried to stop it by stabbing it but had to call in the police, and the animal was shot.

As an aside, I don't think it's morally right or smart to keep chimpanzees or other wild animals as pets. This one dressed and bathed himself, drank from a glass and watched TV, but no matter how much he appeared to be "tamed," wild animals are dangerous, and it's cruel to try to fit them into our lives and then have to destroy them when they act like the wild creatures they are.

In any case, the Post published a cartoon showing two policemen with guns drawn standing over a dead chimp, and they're saying, "They'll have to find someone else to write the next stimulus bill!"

Now although they tried to deny it, it is obvious that the dead chimp is supposed to be President Obama, who had just signed the stimulus bill. There's no excuse for something like this. It is racist, disgusting, and completely over the line.

I'm in favor of freedom of speech, but President Obama was elected by a popular majority and an electoral landslide, and he deserves some respect. Besides, this was practically an incitement to violence. Heads should roll over this. There was a protest at the Post headquarters today. I thought of going to it but didn't quite get myself moving fast enough, and at the time when I should have been getting on the subway I was still at the bank taking care of an errand.

I hope the Post receives millions of protest letters. What they did was an abomination.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Thoughts on "1984"

Recently I rediscovered a longstanding fascination with Orwell’s famous dystopian novel, “1984.” I must have been fairly young when I first read it, maybe not more than ten or eleven years old. Some of it must have sailed straight over my head, just as the other adult novels I read at the time did. Still, I understood enough to compare certain aspects of Orwell’s nightmare vision with the world I saw around me.

At that time I was in junior high school. Although it was a public school and no physical punishment was allowed, our lives were closely regimented. The Assistant Principal, Miss Cahill, was a tyrant worthy of the Thought Police.

She was a blue-haired old lady, in the days when rinses intended to spruce up gray hair turned a woman’s tresses to an unmistakable and unpalatable shade of blue. Rumor had it that she ran her English class like a prison camp. Everyone in the class had to click his pen at exactly the same moment. I guess she’d never recovered from the gradual demise of the fountain pen. If a pen or pencil dared to roll off a desk during Miss Cahill’s lesson, the resulting sound as it clattered to the floor would earn its owner a trip to detention.

I had the good fortune never to end up in her classroom, but Miss Cahill presided over the cafeteria in the same arbitrary and capricious manner that befits all petty tyrants. When she wanted silence, she put two fingers in the air, and everyone else had to put their fingers in the air also. Had I been slightly older, I would have raised only one finger, the one most fraught with emotional significance. As it was, I frequently substituted the Nazi salute. No one ever noticed.

Miss Cahill punished students for their “attitudes,” driven by some inchoate gut feeling that they were not sufficiently submissive to her orders. Time and again I heard her assign students detention for having the wrong look on their faces or because she didn’t like their “attitude.” Orwell had a Newspeak word for this: Facecrime.

I wrote a revolutionary tract urging the students to rise up and fight back, to reclaim our rights to have our faces look any way we wanted, and to talk throughout the lunch period instead of a meager 15-20 minutes until we got the flying fickle finger salute of silence. But I never distributed it. Copying wasn’t so easy back then: you had to use a mimeograph machine or layers of carbon paper in your typewriter. It wasn’t worth it to me. However I rejoiced when once, Miss Cahill pushed us too far and the students fought back, shouting and jumping up on the tables in defiance. We were squelched, but like Winston Smith, I felt for a moment that perhaps the great rebellion was going to succeed. Miss Cahill did flee the cafeteria crying, her hair-trigger nerves shot by our loud defiance. But, as in “1984” our revolt failed.

In any case, I had to recognize that no matter how much Miss Cahill resembled an agent of the Thought Police, the stakes were not nearly as high.

For years, I misinterpreted the ending of the book, believing that Winston was shot to death right there in the Chestnut Tree Café. It took a long time to realize that although physical death was not far away now that he’d fully capitulated, the bullet spoken of was a metaphorical one. His soul and his capacity for independent thought had been blown out as surely as if by a bullet.

So why, then, is such a depressing novel so fascinating to me? I enjoy the beginning, Winston’s rebellion and his affair with Julia. Our modern world has turned out partially like “1984” with a large helping of “Brave New World” added to the mix.

Today, we can be observed through the Internet. There are cameras galore in public places, watching our every move. We’re given the impression that they are used to protect us from terrorism and criminality. To an extent I am sure that’s true but the potential for misuse is huge.

Cookies and spyware watch our activities online. The government in recent years has tapped phone lines with no warrants, and has demanded that bookstores reveal the buying habits of their patrons. A new technology observes you as you watch advertising and adjusts the ad to your gender and age. We’re told that the technology can’t yet recognize the individual watching but is that really true?

Winston would surely find a great deal of modern technology to be frighteningly familiar and even more advanced in some of its spying capabilities.

Falsification is of course possible as evidenced by the epidemic of identity theft. Could the government misuse our personal information? Sure it could.

Can we protect our privacy? At this point, probably not.

As for the affair between Winston and Julia, I don’t see evidence in our modern world that any governmental entity desires to break down the emotional ties and loyalties between friends and family. In the private sector, though, our family lives have often come into conflict with the demands of our jobs. Doesn’t it break down family ties when employees are expected to work overtime, travel anywhere and everywhere, and miss family events in order to give all of their energies to the company? They can’t arrest us or torture us, but they certainly can deprive us of a means to make living, and that’s a serious enough consequence, especially now.

In “1984” sexuality was to be denied and the ultimate goal was to destroy it, abolishing the orgasm and breaking the family unit up so that children would be artificially conceived and then raised by the State. The artificial production of children was achieved in Brave New World but instead of abolishing the sex urge the power elite chose to allow it but to trivialize it. Loyalty to any one person would be “bad for production” and so people were strongly encouraged to be promiscuous, having as many partners as possible and viewing them all as simply recreational companions to whom they owed no exceptional loyalty. In a sense our own society has taken that route, without it being necessarily planned as a way to keep workers “stable” and untroubled by any family stress.

However, romance, love and joyful sex certainly do exist in our world of 2009, and Winston and Julia would be delighted to learn that this is not a crime, at least not in America. There are other places where people are not free to choose their own partners, and where sexual love with a “wrong” partner can be punished by death, such as in the case of “honor killings” of women and girls who are even suspected of illicit or forbidden involvement with men.

So, they would have their work cut out for them, bringing the importance of individual freedom and self-determination to the front and center.

I may have seen the “1984” movie before but I barely remembered it, and it seems a false memory now because I seem to recall watching it in the apartment where I grew up. It isn’t possible that I saw the 1984 version there because we moved out in 1971. I may have seen the 1954 version with Peter Cushing. I watched that one on YouTube the other day and found it dreadful. It was dated and so old-fashioned. The lovers never removed an article of clothing (except for the checkered sash Julia wore- which was supposed to be red, according to the book). The acting was substandard and the whole thing had the feel of a primitive science fiction movie. In fact, that’s what it was.

By contrast, I loved the 1984 version with John Hurt and I have already watched it several times on YouTube. This one was filmed during the exact time period of the book’s setting, from April to June 1984. Clever indeed! Moreover it is extremely true to the book. Everything was dingy, gray and half broken down, just as Orwell described. Winston’s flat in “Victory Mansions” was one step above a slum. No one decorated their homes with anything the least bit personal, so their living quarters were completely soulless.

John Hurt did an excellent acting job. He was completely believable as Winston. His face had a sad and vulnerable look to it even when he was happy with Julia. While not handsome he had a peculiar brand of beauty (as Winston said of the immense prole woman hanging out her wash beneath the secret room, that was his style of beauty).

It’s a fascination I don’t fully understand but I have returned to it from time to time. Could anyone have stood up to the horrors of Room 101? And once the words were spoken, were they really so indelible? Could love be squashed so easily? It’s true that young people in cults have often been brainwashed to believe that their parents are evil, just trying to lure them away from some obscure “truth” with their protestations of love. So maybe it is possible. However, deprogramming suggests that the process is reversible. Could Winston and Julia have been deprogrammed to rediscover their love for each other? It’s possible, but in their world, no one had any interest in doing so.

Just as much as the day it was published, and maybe more so in our modern world where the internet sees all, “1984” stands as a warning and a call to resist the forces that would find it convenient and rewarding to crush the human spirit while making us believe we are living a “new, happy life.” May we always recognize encroachments on our freedom to love, freedom to think and feel, and freedom to remember the past as it was. May we always remember, that 2+2=4.

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

"I Screwed Up"

That's what President Obama said, regarding his supporting Daschle's nomination. Well, maybe he did screw up, maybe Daschle and a couple of others weren't vetted as closely as they could have been.

But I'm proud of the President even if he did "screw up." That's because he's a big enough man and a strong enough man to admit he made a mistake. Oh, sure, President Bush admitted to a few mistaken decisions as he was leaving office. That doesn't exactly help all the people who were harmed by those wrong decisions during his eight years in the presidency.

In President Obama's case, this mistake happened only two weeks after he took office. So he's out there admitting he erred, saying baldly, "I screwed up," without dodging behind excuses. What a refreshing change from the past eight years! In fact, I don't think I've ever heard a POTUS say right out that he screwed up, right in the middle of the problem.

By trying to take accountability to a higher level, our new President puts himself in a more vulnerable position than any past president has ever taken. Will he screw up again in some other way? Probably he will. There's no real preparation for this position. It is unique in the world, and the on-the-job training is as rigorous as it gets. From day one, he's expected to hit the ground running, and never more than today with all the problems he's inherited.

A leader who can say, "I screwed up," deserves respect. We can only learn from our mistakes if we are willing to own up to them. Here's a leader who isn't pretending to be a demigod. He's showing character instead of bluster. Good for him!

Sunday, February 01, 2009

Hire America

I've just read that the banks receiving the biggest bailout money have been applying for the most visas to bring in foreign workers to their employ. This has been going on for at least six years and probably longer. The foreign workers are filling top spots and earning more than $90,000 a year on average. That's more than twice the earnings of an average American household. And those are the very people who got those outrageously large bonuses, that President Obama spoke out against.

This is just wrong in so many ways. At a time when so many Americans are out of work, why are we allowing this to go on? If outsourcing to other countries is something the President wants to see discouraged, then surely "insourcing" of foreigners into the country for the express purpose of snapping up American jobs should be firmly discouraged as well.

The ironic part of this is that the reason these foreigners are being hired is not that they are more competent than American workers, but that these companies find ways to pay them less than what they would have to pay their U.S. born and bred counterparts. Now, I personally can't find myself weeping for the unfairness of earning "only" $90K, but there it is: we're spending our taxpayer money bailing out these banks that have mishandled the trust we put in them, and they are returning the favor by putting Americans out of work, every which way they can.

I want to see a law, plain and simple. No more outsourcing. No more favoring foreign workers over Americans. If two people apply for a job and have equal qualifications, the American citizen gets the job. Period, end of story. Why should people who have worked here and paid taxes their whole lives be put out of work and maybe out on the street, so that companies can pay foreigners less?

Oh, and those equal qualifications must NOT have anything to do with bilingualism. That should no longer be permitted to be a job qualification. Yes, I'm in favor of our next generation, the little ones, learning a second language. But which language are they going to learn? Here where I live, you can't get a job unless you speak Russian, or Chinese (Mandarin or Cantonese...maybe both), or Korean, or....you get the picture. And once they learn a second language thoroughly, meaning from pre-kindergarten onward, then it might be fair and equitable to allow bilingualism to be a job qualification.

But not now. No young adult of working age today who was born to English-speaking, American parents and educated in our public schools can possibly compete with a native born speaker or a child of native speakers. We have to level the playing field here, and the only way to do it is to abolish bilingualism for at least the next 18 years, and then institute foreign language as a subject taught from pre-kindergarten forward.

Otherwise, the foreigners will pour in, destroy our standard of living by accepting lower wages, and take away all our jobs because they are "bilingual" (some of them marginally able to speak English still get jobs requiring them to speak on the telephone) and we, victimized by our school systems, are not.

In England, workers are striking and demanding that jobs be given to native Englishmen and Englishwomen before foreigners. Good for them! We need a similar outcry here.

So here's my battle cry: buy American, as much as possible, hire Americans first, and take bilingualism out of the job descriptions!

Saturday, January 31, 2009

Busy, Busy

The last couple of weeks, and now the coming week, are going to be very busy ones for me. So much is happening that I'm having a hard time keeping it all straight and recording it all in my three planners: the calendar on the kitchen wall, the pink planner in my tote bag, and Outlook on the computer.

I've been asked to serve on a steering committee for The Hetrick-Martin Institute to plan activities for their 30th anniversary year. We had a choice of subcommittees and I chose the Archive subcommittee. The idea of going through old papers and memorabilia intrigues me, and I liked the idea of interviewing alumni, former board members, and former staff. We've got a Yahoo group started so the subcommittee can keep in touch with each other, and I've suggested we do some of the interviews through StoryCorps.

This week, I have a conference phone call at noon on Monday for the Brooklyn Humanist Community. We're getting started with the incorporation process and this is the first step. At one I'll have an interview for a long-term temporary position.

On Tuesday I'm volunteering at HMI and then there's the BHC Board meeting at night. Wednesday evening I'm meeting with someone I worked with in the past, and I'll possibly write a grant for her start up organization. On Thursday morning I've signed up for a workshop on planning special events, through the Foundation Center.

By Friday, if I am not too exhausted, I might go and help out with the physical archives. Somewhere in there I also have to get medical clearance to volunteer with veterans in hospice, work on another grant with the War Resisters League, and arrange lunch with a friend.

I'm sure glad we are basically goofing off today, until the party tonight. It's Bruce's birthday and was our friend Tony's birthday on Thursday. So we've got a January Babies party for tonight, complete with a grab bag so everyone gets a small gift. Tomorrow I'm getting my hair cut, as it is approaching Lady Godiva length, and then on Monday the whirlwind begins.

Friday, January 23, 2009

Thinking About the Afterlife

Do I believe in an afterlife? Generally I answer yes. I've written an entire manuscript based on the idea that there is an afterlife and I have been in contact with the spirits of various loved ones who have died, or, as devotees of the afterworld prefer to say, have "crossed over." I had many experiences around ten years ago and for the next few years, that convinced me we do go on in some form or another.


I'm not sure exactly what to believe in terms of what that form may take. I have read quite a few books on the subject: Hello from Heaven, books by popular mediums such as James Van Pragh, Sylvia Browne, John Edwards, and Rosemary Altea. In fact I saw Rosemary Altea in person through a class given by the Learning Annex. I don't remember so much about the readings she gave but I do remember that at one point I turned my head to look at an empty pew behind me (the event took place in a large church), and saw what I can only describe as an ameboid blob of ectoplasm, undulating. When I glanced back a second time it was gone.


So I have to believe I have seen, felt, and heard the spirit world at various times,and yet now, all this seems so remote with the passage of years. At one point I was sure I would never be afraid of death again, but in fact that feeling has proven to be only temporary, and any alarming symptom still has the powerto send me into a panicked tailspin.


Still, some of the things that happened back then are extremely hard to explain. For instance, in 1999, everyone was worried about Y2K computer compatibility. There were dire warnings that our computer systems might all collapse bringing the end of the world as we know it, Bruce was using an old version of Quicken on our vintage Macintosh Performa, which has long since gone to computer heaven. The computer froze up on him and he rebooted, calling out to our deceased friend Richard to help him out.


When the computer booted up again and Bruce opened Quicken, it was suddenly Y2K compatible. I still cannot think of a sensible explanation for this. What could change the program in the blink of an eye? Bruce had installed no upgrades. Even stranger, Quicken remained Y2K compatible for several days and then reverted to its former self.


It was episodes like these that made Bruce into a believer. I had already been convinced by other events: dreams that came true, a New York Yankees hat sliding towards me at the North Sea in the Netherlands, bearing a strong resemblance to the hats Richard used to wear. So many things happened that convinced me Richard, my mother, and other friends who died in 2000 and beyond were watching over me and looking out for my welfare.


Yet now, it all seems rather remote. I still see some of the signs but have I grown cynical again? Perhaps I have. I do think of Richard when I see the numbers 7, 77, or any string of 7's. I know that in the numerology system, 7 is considered a perfect number, recognized by several world religions. I also know that in the Gematria, the number 26, which is my birthday and my brother's birthday, and which popped up so often in my mother's life that she became afraid of it and tried to avoid the number, has a special and very positive meaning. Twenty-six stands for the unpronounceable Hebrew name of God. When I see that number, I think of it as a sign from Mom and a special blessing.


And yet, in bed at night, sometimes when I can't get to sleep, I worry and fear death. I fear the dying process will hurt, at least in the beginning. I have seen that at the end the dying person sinks into a coma and there doesn't seem to be a struggle or pain at the moment of passing. But it is the ravages of loss of control, pain and debilitation that I fear most.


I also find the thought of the world"wagging on" without me disturbing. If I am conscious and watching from the other side, fine, but I resent the thought that the world will change, my son will live out his life, probably have children and grandchildren,and at some point I won't be there to see it any more. At least if I can watch and lend an occasional etheric hand, whisper some long-forgotten motherly advice in his ear..that might be satisfactory!


The thought that I could be all wrong and there might be nothing afterwards, just a blankness I can only imagine by trying to remember what the world was like before I was born, still haunts me even though I had so many experiences and so many contacts with the afterlife that I should be more secure in that knowledge by now. I don't know why. I had so many readings that rang true. A medium gave me accurate information about my paternal grandfather. She didn't even know my name, and he died before I was born so I knew very little about him. She could not have been drawing this information from my mind,because it was never in my mind to begin with. The only possible explanation is that she was truly in touch with his spirit.


So, why do I still have these doubts and fears?

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

"Milk"

This afternoon I met Jason in Chelsea and we saw "Milk." The price was high: $25 for the two of us, no student discount and no matinees. I don't feel gypped at all, though my wallet is considerably lighter.

"Milk" was excellent. Sean Penn did a wonderful acting job and I hope he gets an Oscar for it. As the film progressed, I realized that even though I'd known of Harvey Milk and his assassination, I really never knew the details of his life and what he accomplished.

After the Stonewall Riots, there were certainly the stirrings of a gay rights movement afoot, but Harvey Milk seems to have put it on the map. He brought the gay population of San Francisco together to fight against the discrimination, harassment, violence and even murder that dogged them, just because they were gay. He lost his bid for City Supervisor three times but came back again until he won. Because of his leadership, gays gained a voice and gained many rights they never had before.

Though I don't remember his activities and speeches per se, I do remember his arch-opponent, Anita Bryant, and her revolting, bigoted efforts to relegate gays to second-class citizenship as people who were not acceptable to right-wing Christians and to God. I do remember seeing buttons lambasting her with the slogan, "A day without human rights is like a day without sunshine," a parody of her orange juice ads years earlier (a day without orange juice is a day without sunshine).

The film delved into Milk's private life. Yes, it's a cliche that when a person becomes deeply involved in a cause larger than himself, his intimates often suffer. So Milk's lover, Scott, picked up on impulse in a New York City subway station in 1970, left him because he could no longer stand to be part of the political campaigning that took up so much of Milk's time and energy. And Milk's next lover, the passionate but emotionally frail Jack, committed suicide because Milk came home late from the Supervisor job one time too many.

I'm not sure at what moment I realized who Milk's murderer was going to be, but towards the last quarter of the film it became clear that another Supervisor was going to kill him, and the Mayor as well. Milk is portrayed as sensing in advance that he was not going to live to see 50, and that his death would be violent. He'd received death threats and he knew his stance as an openly gay politician was extremely dangerous. So we see him, at intervals throughout the film, speaking his story into a tape recorder, to be aired only in the event of his assassination.

Sadly, his fears came true, and he was murdered along with the Mayor. The candlelight march through the streets of San Francisco in their memory was a very moving scene. Jason whispered to me that he had tears in his eyes. So did I, and that doesn't happen very often.

Thirty years ago, just a year after Harvey Milk's murder at age 48, a teenage boy was beaten and raped in a New York City homeless shelter, because he was gay. Instead of acting to protect him, the shelter authorities blamed the victim and threw him out. Two gay men, one a psychiatrist, were appalled at this story and started a voluntary program to help LGBT youth who were not adequately protected by the system. From their efforts grew the Hetrick-Martin Institute, the home of the Harvey Milk High School.

A particularly poignant scene, for me, was the one where a gay teenager calls Harvey Milk and begs him to help. He says his parents are going to send him away to be "treated" for his "sickness" of homosexuality. The boy says he is going to kill himself. Milk tells him to get on a bus and get out of there, just leave home and head to a big city where he can find understanding and others like himself. The camera pulls back and we see that the boy is in a wheelchair. His situation seems hopeless, and Milk is forced to hang up the phone because a riot is going on in the street.

Later in the film, we learn that the boy got a friend to put him on a bus to LA, and he calls Harvey Milk in the middle of a referendum on Proposition 6 (the notorious attempt to strip LGBT's of their rights to housing and jobs), to tell him that he is doing fine, and that Los Angeles has voted the proposition down.

It's kids like that boy who show up at the doors of The Hetrick-Martin Institute. Seeing "Milk" has made me doubly proud to volunteer there, and indirectly serve the students at a high school named for Harvey Milk. My highest recommendations for this movie!

Inauguration Day

Yesterday was a day that will be in the history books: January 20, 2009, and kids generations from now will have to memorize it: the day the first biracial man of African-American and European-American ancestry took office as the President of the United States.

Almost 2 million people were in Washington D.C., filling the mall all the way from the Capitol to the Washington Monument. I've been in some pretty big crowds on that mall, at anti-war protests in the seventies, but this crowd of every color and every faith was bigger than all of them.

Jason and I watched some of it on streaming video. My computer was not cooperating. We kept losing connectivity every couple of minutes. Finally I shut down the streaming video and listened to President Obama take the oath of office over the radio. I noticed that it got slightly garbled, that Chief Justice Stevens mixed up the words a little bit and got the new President off track. They repeated the oath today, just to be sure.

I liked the inauguration speech. President Obama appealed to the virtues and values we all grew up on. He said we're going to get to work rebuilding America and that we're not going to serve narrow interests any longer. America is not just for the rich.

While he held out the hand of friendship to all nations, he also warned terrorists that they cannot outlast us and we will defeat them. Good strong words, and they are certainly needed now. Just because he is a Democrat and a liberal, there's no reason to think he is going to be a pushover when the nation is in danger.

I'm pleased, also, that President Obama mentioned that we are a nation of many faiths and also of some nonbelievers too. That's probably the first time ever that agnostics and atheists have been given recognition in an inaugural address. That is also a step forward.

We didn't have a television to watch the Inaugural Ball, but I enjoyed viewing the photos on the New York Times website. The Obamas are a beautiful and hot couple, and it's clear from the way they looked at each other and laughed together that they are deeply in love. It's got nothing to do with politics, but it was uplifting to see.

I've said it before: we've broken a barrier that many people thought would never fall down, and the excitement and joy particularly among African-Americans was similar to the joy when the Berlin Wall came down. We haven't abolished racism, that doesn't happen in one single moment. But we've grown up as a nation, and now, the possibilities are infinite.

I wore my Obama 1-20-2009 tee shirt and it felt so good to finally have a President who is going to lead us back to the path of goodwill, compassion, and common sense. To the rule of law, rather than to the rule of expediency. For so long, I was afraid to buy that tee shirt, afraid that Bush would be replaced by someone just like him. But that didn't happen, thank God.

The whole world was watching, and just about all of the world was very happy. Commentators kept mentioning that at such a difficult time, they had never seen so much hope.

Hope alone won't save us, but this man...yes, folks, this late-born Baby Boomer (our day is not over yet) has the power to inspire a new generation to work together. I'm excited to be here to see this and to have the chance to put my energies into the rebuilding we have to do.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Everything but the Kitchen Sink

Yesterday was a strange day full of ups and downs. It began on an unpleasant note. We could not use the kitchen sink because the pipes under the sink were leaking and a flood spread all the way across the floor. Bruce had to mop it up when he woke up at 5 in the morning, because the basin we put underneath the pipe was overflowing. A few hours later when I got up, the basin was overflowing again, and the linoleum was soaked. Water was spread across the floor and even reached the door of Jason’s bedroom. So, I’d made frantic forays downstairs to the superintendent, begging him to come and help.

Now, technically, he doesn’t have to do a thing. We live in a co-op so he’s only responsible for the common areas. If a leak comes down to our apartment from upstairs, it is his job to repair the damage, yet he has often been extremely slow to respond to requests to plaster our bathroom ceiling. We once had a gaping hole in our ceiling for well over a year because he just could not be bothered to come and work on it, and after a while I gave up trying. It took a great deal of persistence to finally get him to come up and seal the hole.

So, I didn’t feel particularly sympathetic to him just because he wasn’t really obligated to fix our leaking faucet. Besides, our apartment is directly over the Board president’s, and that gentleman doesn’t hesitate to complain if something from our apartment bothers him. Once he sent Stanley up to put little felt pads on the bottom of our kitchen chair and table legs, because the slight noise of our chairs being moved disturbed him. Truly, I would not want to put this man in bed with a pea under his mattress!

So I knew that if he got any water coming down from our apartment into his, he would be shrieking at Stanley to do something about it. Armed with that knowledge, I enlisted his wife in the campaign to get Stanley to fix the leak.

It must have worked because Stanley showed up at ten this morning in a totally surly mood. I didn’t realize that he would have to get all the way under the sink to fix it and install a new faucet, so I didn’t remove all the stuff from underneath it when he told me to. He threw everything out onto the floor, and then crawled under the sink. He wouldn’t speak to me and he went in and out of the apartment without saying a word. That’s his typical behavior but this time I sensed there was more anger behind it than simple indifference.

When he was finished, he left without even telling me he was done. I was left with the dilemma of deciding whether or not he deserved a tip. I don’t feel he deserves it, because he did not have to help out yet he agreed to, but then he was obnoxious about it. However, in pragmatic terms, it’s better to catch flies with honey, only in this instance the sweet stuff is green, begins with an “M”, and is not found in beehives.

Once Stanley left, I cleaned up the mess. There were sopping wet shirts and socks we’d left under the sink planning to use them as cleaning rags. But we’d never used them, so I felt no guilt about tossing them out. The rock salt I bought so I could scatter it like Janey Appleseed when I went out on icy days had fused together into one solid and useless lump, so I chucked that too. I tossed the water-damaged items also. I saved the sponges, since they’re supposed to get wet anyway, and left the detergent stains on the dark linoleum, to be mopped up another day. One thing I can say in favor of a leaky faucet, it forced us to mop the kitchen floor.

Once the entire cleanup was done, Jason and I headed out to the Museum of Natural History.

Friday, January 09, 2009

Mosaic, a Novel

Recently I finished reading Mosaic, a novel by Soheir Khashoggi. It bears similarities to Betty Mahmoody's Not Without My Daughter, the true saga of Mahmoody's escape from Iran with her daughter, against her husband's will. In Mosaic, Dina's husband Karim spirits their two youngest children away to Jordan in the belief that he must do it in order to raise them with proper Muslim family values. After living in New York for decades, he's come to the conclusion that American values are flawed and decadent, and he must take the two younger ones away from their influence before they turn out like their teenage brother Jordy.

Like Mahmoody, the fictional Dina refuses to hand her children over to Karim to raise in a completely different culture. She fears for them, because they are American children in a country where Americans are not liked. Her husband's betrayal shatters her happy life and sets her on a dangerous mission to retrieve her children at any cost.

In her time of need, Dina reaches out to her two best friends, Sarah and Em. The three of them each have a "man" problem. Em, an African-American woman from Louisiana, has an ex who walked out on her and their son 15 years earlier, and has hardly ever contacted his son. Sarah is divorced from her Israeli husband, who refused to give her a get (a Jewish divorce).

Each of these characters is well developed and has her issues move to resolution. But in the meantime, Dina finds herself a professional rescuer of abducted children and travels to Jordan to try to get her twins back. Her in-laws are hostile and suspicious except for her sister-in-law. Karim is overbearing. He's the man and he fully intends to continue doing things his way, whether Dina likes it or not.

The attempt doesn't come off. John Constantine, the rescuer, spots trouble in the form of Karim's security men, and backs off.

Meanwhile, however, Karim is struggling with his own conscience. He'd like to feel wholly self righteous, and he'd like to believe he was acting in his children's best interest, but guilt nags at him. When he sees how unhappy Suzy is, he agrees to let her go home to New York with Dina so long as he can keep Ali. Apparently it is important to him to keep Ali safe from the pernicious influences in America that affected Jordan, their eldest.

The big secret about Jordan: he's gay. That's acceptable here, but in the Muslim world, it's an abomination, unnatural. Karim seems to think that if he keeps Ali in the Muslim culture he can save him from following in his brother's footsteps.

Without giving the whole story away, things reach an acceptable, even hopeful, conclusion, for just about everyone. I found this book a pleasure because it portrayed everyone as a three-dimensional human being with good points as well as flaws. Karim is no one-dimensional villain. He's wrong, by my lights, but he's a real person who can reflect and acknowledge mistakes. These are real people, everyone from his or her own specific background, and their differences make up the beautiful mosaic that the title refers to.

Mosaic is also the name of Dina's business, and part of the marital drift between Dina and Karim is her independence and success as a businesswoman. Karim sees it as taking time away from her family, and in fact he abducts the twins while she is out at work. Mosaic, the novel, raises relevant questions about male/female dynamics, Muslim culture versus mainstream American culture, and ethnic paranoia on both sides of the 9/11 divide. I recommend this book highly.