Helen Keller and Me

When I was eight years old, Mom took me to see a double feature at Radio City Music Hall. The films were a Doris Day movie, "State Fair," and Patty Duke and Ann Bancroft in "The Miracle Worker."

I was thoroughly bored by "State Fair," much to Mom's surprise as she thought it would be entertaining for a little girl. The entire movie (the plot of which I have mercifully forgotten) seemed to be nothing but fluff, cotton candy for the mind. All I can remember is an elephant standing on a revolving platform, and someone singing a silly song about him. At that point I jumped up in the darkened theater, put my hands on my hips and huffed, "This movie is about absolutely nothing!" Then I sat down with my arms folded and ungraciously endured the rest of it.

But when "The Miracle Worker" began I was immediately fascinated by Helen and her teacher Annie Sullivan, as they struggled, fought, and forged a relationship. Helen's triumph at the end, saying, "Wa wa" as the water from the well gushed over her fingers, and then going into a "What's this word?" frenzy as the meaning of the sign language alphabet dawned on her, made an impression that has lasted a lifetime.

After seeing the movie I went out and read several biographies of Helen Keller from the library. I was intrigued by her managing to achieve so much even though she lived in darkness and silence. I learned the sign language alphabet. Around that time someone gave me a tall doll, "Caroline," that was probably modeled after Caroline Kennedy, and it would walk if you led it by the hand. I pretended I was Annie Sullivan and the doll was Helen Keller, and I spelled words into her hand to talk to her.

Years later I read a Reader's Digest article by Helen Keller, about how she would spend a week of her life if she were granted the power to see and hear for just 7 days. She talked about viewing sunsets, nature, movies, rainbows, and all the things we see and take for granted. She wrote of attending symphonies and hearing all kinds of sounds and music, including the natural calls of birds in the woods. I wondered how she would be able to stand it when the darkness and silence closed in again at the end of the week.

A few days ago I went to the eye doctor and learned that there were two blood spots in one eye. He says they are not a danger but that it is a big wake up call to get my sugar under control. Since then I have been exercising and I joined Lucille Roberts to get on a regular exercise program. I've never been a fan of exercise and I always hated gym, but I can't imagine living as Helen Keller did, and I don't want to have to be blind. There are just too many things I would miss, and I would never feel safe walking around unable to see, even with a cane or a guide dog.

I've been looking at everything, appreciating colors and design and natural beauty, in a way I don't often think about. It could be taken away from me, if I'm not careful. It could happen anyhow I suppose but maybe I can stall it off until I'm so old that it won't much matter. In any case the doctor indicated it can be reversed at this early stage so I am going all out. Despite my admiration for Helen Keller I have no desire to live in eternal night. If it is up to me at all I am not going to let that happen.