In the Flesh Erotic Reading Series

Last night Bruce and I visited the Happy Endings lounge in Chinatown and attended the "Virgin Night" of the In the Flesh Erotic Reading Series. Their blog can be found at www.inthefleshreadingseries.blogspot.com.

The lounge is a small bar over a Chinese health club. We could hear Asian music wafting up from the downstairs club, since the stairway was not blocked by a door. I haven't been in a bar in years and it was hard to get used to the dim candlelight. Even in the bathroom, the light was dim since they used only red lightbulbs in there. The drinks cost $12 each. That may be normal Manhattan pricing these days but it sure made me glad that I am not allowed to drink.

The hostess put candy and cupcakes on the tables and I have to admit I broke down and ate a chocolate cupcake, but it was tiny. So I figure it was about two bites of a normal cupcake.

The reading started a few minutes late and was led off by the hostess, who has a prolific imagination. She hastened to inform us that the story was pure fiction. Good thing because otherwise she'd be exhausted from her sexual exploits!

Some of the pieces that were read were calculated to raise the temperature in the bar (though none did, and I was wearing my raincoat around my shoulders because of the air conditioning). Others were not only sensual but also hilarious. The tale of James Blond, hairdresser and environmentalist spy, saving the world from bad air and bad hair, brought a lot of chuckles. But I nearly wet my pants laughing at the story of two yuppies who had determined that the best place and time to conceive their baby was sometime slightly after 2:30 AM on Monkey Island at the Central Park Zoo. So they sneak in without attracting the attention of the guard or waking the monkeys and they begin going at it.

But then one of the monkeys wakes up, alerted by their moans, and they find themselves face to face with a curious and intrusive snow monkey...

The description was absolutely hilarious, and they still succeeded in conceiving their child. What a story they will have to tell when that kid asks, "Mom, how did I get here?"

The hottest erotic scene was read by Colette Gale, who read an excerpt from her novel, Unmasked, An Erotic Novel of the Phantom of the Opera. A close second was the young man who read last; about a man who finds himself in a compromising position with another woman, not his girlfriend, and is subjected to her bad poetry before she takes him to bed.

These readings take place every third Thursday of the month, and since we aren't drinkers we didn't have to spend a cent. Next time, I'll bring my own snacks so I won't be tempted to break my diet with all that candy. Since most of the people there were young (20's and 30's) they hadn't yet reached the age when candy and cupcakes become evil and forbidden fruits. Much better for me to munch on celery and just enjoy the sensual stories without blowing the diet!

This was different and fun, and I recommend it to anyone close to the New York City area.